"jenn pants" - jan. 2/04

(Dan's msn name is "Jenn doesn't wear pants, everybody point and laugh")
mike: haha that's an interesting name
dan: yes
dan: jenn agrees
dan: ... with much anger and hatred
"talk it out" - jan. 2/04

jenn: courses
jenn: still never got em figured out
adam: so whats going on?
mike: bummer
jenn: i could do it in the van on the way there though
jenn: i'll be right back guys, talk it out, i'm back in 5 just gotta call genee
adam: but what are we doing?
mike: apparently we're deciding something
jenn: talk it out
jenn: i'll be right baaaack
mike: sounds like we were fighting
mike: "now now, boys, talk it out"
adam: haha man i just wanna go for a couple beers
"peers" - jan. 4/04

silv: That's a quality about you everyone has come to expect and love, mike - your willingness to publicly humiliate someone in front of their peers.
"introduction" - jan. 5/04

dave: I'm Dave, I'm in third year, and...I've never been in prison.
"chemicals" - jan. 6/04

wade: I'm old, I require chemicals now.
"doctor" - jan. 9/04

jay: how your classes been?
mike: they're alright
mike: same old
jay: ain't no thang. But a.... chicken wing. I'm changing my major to sport psychology. I'm gonna be a doctor
mike: oh cool
mike: that's a good area to get into
jay: DR. Hoffman
jay: haha
mike: haha
mike: but i have to go get ready i'll talk to ya later
jay: brain surgery next
jay: all right
mike: see ya dr. hoffman
jay: nice that soinds great
jay: bye
"penis picture" - jan. 10/04

dale: You don't want to say because it would convict you as the penis-picture-taker-of-er!
"water taste" - jan. 12/04

meghan: Water has no taste but that water taste.
"cheese" - jan. 14/04

melissa: It sucks because I'm the only one from the east. I'm all alone. I'm like the cheese!
"corneas" - jan. 14/04

mike: It's the bats, man...they've sucked out your corneas.
"jellyfish" - jan. 14/04

shaun: All I see is a fucking jellyfish.
"tumpe's ass" - jan. 18/04

mike: i am putting all the camcorder stuff on VHS right now so i can tape over the tapes
mike: and it's at the Tumpe moment
meghan: that's just great
meghan: i love my pic of tumpe's ass
meghan: i am gonna blow it up and frame it
mike: lol
mike: someday you will be really famous and the only picture hanging in your office will be tumpe's ass
meghan: and i would only have children so i can tell then the story of tumpe's ass
mike: "moooom! granny meghan's telling the elephant story again!"
mike: "make her stop!"
"ian likes money" - jan. 19/04

ian: Ian likes money. It makes me drunk with love...oh, and beer.
"chances" - jan. 20/04

dave: Let's be honest. The chances of us making it there are pretty slim.
"WWJD?" - jan. 21/04

jay: why are you in newfoundland?
jay: besides journalism
mike: it's for a canadian university press conference
jay: oh i see
jay: don't bother with the details. I'll just smile a nod with my eyes closed.
mike: haha
mike: university papers
mike: we send delegates to this conference
mike: vote on things on how the papers run
jay: What do you call a fruit that isn't allowed to get married on a wim?
jay: CANTELOPE!!!!
jay: haha
mike: haha
jay: i thought of that myself.
jay: k, have fun, and when ever you thinking about doing something, ask yourself
jay: WWJD, What would JASON do.
jay: night
"prince george" - jan. 22/04

CUP organizer: We have people here from St. John's all the way across to Victoria and from Prince George! So it's great to see every-
al: PRINCE GEORRRRGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!
CUP organizer: Uhhh, yeah, Prince George??
"wacky" - jan. 24/04

jay: so hows the confrence? Boring. That's what it thought.
jay: I have NO LEGS!!!
mike: lol
mike: it's boring for a while
mike: then we go drink
mike: and it gets better
jay: nice
jay: i wish i was in New Found land
jay: Are there midgets there?
jay: I always picture dwarfs and midgets there
mike: uh no
mike: they are normal people
jay: Normal, that sounds boring. They're wacky, just like all of us. Come on your a writer spice it up. When I would tell the story i would say it's like bizarro world. Left is right, right is left. stuff like that.
mike: haha okay fine
mike: wait till i get back
mike: then the wacky stories will come
jay: you want wacky i'll give you wacky.
jay: Did I tell you the time I slipped walking down the road and pulled some old lady with me?
jay: She wasn't too happy.
mike: haha
mike: no you did not
jay: alright have a good night and remember WWJD
mike: well it IS icy here
mike: i will look for an old lady and fall and drag her with me
jay: go find an old lady
jay: NICE!!!
jay: you fukin rule
"night owl" - jan. 27/04

jay: GO To Bed you frinkin night owl
mike: i'm working
mike: gotta do the omega, it's due in tomorrow
jay: nice, prostrastination is king
jay: haha
mike: haha
"kettle" - jan. 27/04

jenn: i am freaking out
shaun: lol
mike: wow
shaun: how did you manage that
jenn: i was making tea and didn't put the toot toot in
mike: plastic kettle?
jenn: cuz like 2 hours ago i was telling my friend that i need to be reminded the water is on cuz i ALWAYS forget
shaun: i hope it was plastic cause otherwise it would have been on there a longgggggggggg time
jenn: and like 30 min ago i was like 'wait... was i making tea?"
jenn: and i went out and it smelled bad and i tried to lift the kettle and it was stuck and really really hot and the element was like white hot
jenn: and it was all black on the outside
jenn: and and
mike: metal!
jenn: hyperventilating
jenn: omg
jenn: omgomgmgomg
jenn: OMG
mike: calm down!
shaun: breathe
jenn: if i had left it any longer it prob could have combusted
jenn: OH
jenn: MY
jenn: GOD
mike: but you didn't
shaun: BUT you didn't
mike: lol
shaun: haha
mike: cheer up
jenn: seriously, it was scary
mike: it's not a big deal
jenn: i pried it off
jenn: and now that it's cooling down... there are little metal shards flying off the burner
jenn: kettle shrapnel
mike: oooh
jenn: it's not even MY KETTLE
jenn: it's like my roomates kettle that she's had for a long time
jenn: winnie the pooh
shaun: shitty
jenn: I tried scrubbing the black stuff off
shaun: paint it
jenn: and it worked
jenn: it looks fine now
jenn: but there is metal missing off the bottom
jenn: and the cap melted off the spout
mike: i think it's a goner
jenn: the kettle is fine now
jenn: i dunno if the lid will come off though
shaun: just make it a shrine now, to remember that you have tea on
jenn: seroiusly for years i've forgotten that i'm making tea
jenn: and my mom always says :you're gonnna burn the house down
jenn: and i say it's redicuoouos
jenn: but we always had a sturdyer kettle...
jenn: oh man
jenn: i just can't imagine what would have happened if i hadn't realized
shaun: jenn
jenn: it really really scares me
shaun: ...breathe
jenn: and all this week my roomates have been like "jenn hey you forgot the kettle
jenn: fack i'm an IDIOT
jenn: ok
jenn: i'll breathe
jenn: but i mean i was in shock a min ago just thinking "i gotta DO something here
jenn: omg never been in THIS kinda situation beofre...
jenn: and now i'm just choked
shaun: cover it in ducktape and say you're preserving it
jenn: i mean it sounds trivial and stupid
jenn: but it's a freaking METAL KETTLE
jenn: melted to the stove
jenn: lol
jenn: preserving it
jenn: i am glad you guys are awake
shaun: yeah
shaun: for the better of mankind
jenn: or i'd just be freaking out right now
jenn: the element is on the table right now spittling kettle shrapnel
jenn: there is white metal stuck to it
shaun: burning a whole through the table
mike: haha
jenn: this is such...
jenn: such a JENN THING
shaun: Oo Oo shaun would do it too
jenn: i dunno...
mike: no shaun would burn hiimself
jenn: you might melt yourself...but not the kettle
shaun: except i don't drink tea
shaun: "I'm melting"
jenn: ahahaha
jenn: i can hear you say that
shaun: and then she would tell us the exact temp of the element upon melt time
jenn: lol
jenn: shut it
mike: hahaha
shaun: haha no
mike: the melting point
jenn: your family eats tURkey
shaun: this incident will be known from this day forth as MELTING POINT
jenn: you know how when your mind is in panic mode and doesn't quite work roperly
jenn: i saw it and smelled it and was like "oh god" and grabbed it
jenn: "oh hot"
jenn: and "oh... very heavy"
jenn: lol
jenn: then my brain went "why is it heavy.... what's IN THE KETTLE"
jenn: i shoulda just left it there and pretended i knew nothing about it lol
mike: oh look
mike: the kettle mysteriously FUSED to the stove overnight
jenn: lolol
shaun: hahaha
jenn: oh shit
jenn: this is too funny in my altered state
jenn: i'm laughing belly laugh
jenn: i wanna curl up in a ball
jenn: and make everything go away for a few hours
jenn: everythign going wrong
jenn: like just very little sleep then sleeping in class then printer dying for the second day in a row after buy $30 ink cartridge then msn shutting off when trtansfering files to roomates comp to print them there, then her printer dying then losing my stapler that i swear i put in one specific place yesterday, then that making me late and giveing me no time ot start this stupid chem lab then seeing Lindsay on the way to lab and her saying she hopes i'm done my comp lab portion cuz the lab is closed at 4:30... at which point it was 4:32...lab closed and late for eso lab... to which i arrive late to find myself in the middle of a quiz i hadn't considered would be happening.
jenn: then spent worst lab just getting a headache cuz it made no sense and i was put with this wierd, kinda subltey jerkish lab partner who looked EXACTLTY like Kyle and kept talking down to me even though it's a freaking first year lab and he's prob in first year
jenn: pouring... absolutely pouring outside... no jacket... cold, just to add insult to injury.
jenn: they're little things
jenn: but they add
jenn: and i thought it was just really funny all these monday things.... until the kettle melted.
"sodomy" - jan. 30/04

trivia question: True or false: sodomy is illegal in 48 states?
meghan: That's why we live in Canada!!
(a few minutes later)
meghan: What does sodomy mean?
"parallel" - jan. 31/04

jay: I run parallel to my perpendictular mind
"horn man" - feb. 1/04

jenn: Horn man is the peak of my day.
"babies" - feb. 2/04

jenn: ugh babies are not fun
jenn: unless they are ugly
jenn: and not mine
"ken takes pictures" - feb. 4/04

nick: What are you going to take a picture of?
ken: I gotta go to some stupid place to take a picture of some stupid people doing something stupid. You know, the usual - stupid.
"back jumping" - feb. 5/04

shaun: hows the campaign your being forced to create
mike: well
mike: you're all ninjas
shaun: sweet
mike: who have to fight ninja bears
mike: giant ninja grizzly bears
shaun: wow!
shaun: sweet
mike: then you warp and have to fight their Icewind Dale cousins, the Polar Bear Posse
mike: who are also ninjas
shaun: aww they must be soo cold
jeremy: well we'll give stuff to add to it this sunday
jeremy: we could go back jumping
shaun: back jumping?
mike: backyard?
jeremy: no we jump on random peoples backs (making sure we are wear pads cup etc.)
jeremy: and let them beat us up
shaun: uhhh
mike: oh
jeremy: and we award points
jeremy: for the bigger the person
"spider" - feb. 5/04

mike: after watching return of the king
mike: since they don't kill the giant spider
mike: we were saying how funny it would be if at the end, it kept leaping out and killing people
shaun: lol
shaun: fucking spider
mike: like "oh, frodo and sam are in the house all happy! BAM! spider"
mike: oh there goes bilbo onto the boat - BAM SPIDER
mike: aragorn is king and he is kissing arwen.....................BAM SPIDER
mike: that would rule
"transition" - feb. 5/04

chris g: I just wanted to go sober -- drunk. I didn't want that transition period.
"poster" - feb. 11/04

shaun: you know what you have to do
shaun: Is take a picture of me, and blow it up to poster size, and get random people to sign it
shaun: and say that if they ever see me, to beat me up
shaun: lol
"romantic" - feb. 14/04

dale: the day's been pretty romantic
dale: I sat around in my underwear and played video games all day
"oil" - feb. 15/04

shaun: i collect oil
shaun: it's my new hobby
mike: oil huh
shaun: yeah
mike: like motor oil?
shaun: melissa is gonna bring me back some oil from polterguiesia or wherever she is
mike: provost
shaun: right that's it
"hallucinate" - feb. 16/04

shaun: so you gonna go buy some Arrkiva chips?
shaun: shit
shaun: arriba
mike: nope
shaun: how come
shaun: you no likey?
shaun: they taste yummy in the tummy
mike: nah
shaun: i love you miek
mike: i'll pass the message on to miek if i ever see him
shaun: great thanks
shaun: i can never reach him
shaun: melissa is gonna name your love child, ugly ass donkey faced kid
mike: so she's going to name it shaun?
shaun: yeah
shaun: that's what i said wasn'tit
mike: pretty much
shaun: yeha
shaun: u HUH
shaun: shit
shaun: UH HUH
shaun: ;adfjasdklfj
shaun: ;askdfj;asdkfj
shaun: crach!@
shaun: dude i feel loaded right now
mike: maybe you are
mike: they're pumping alcoholic gas through the vents
mike: vodka vapour
shaun: haha no i'm just sooo tired i'm halucinating
shaun: i keep hearing shit
shaun: i should make myself some coffee
shaun: argg i hate coffee
"newfoundland pictures" - feb. 16/04

mike: hey al i can send you the newfoundland pictures i've done so far if you want
al: okay that would be cool.
al: yeah do that and then I can save them on my parents computer.
al: thanks
al: my mom was just in here but she had to leave the room when she saw the picture of Dave Gracey in bed.
mike: hahaha
"deathbolt" - feb. 17/04

shaun: hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhahahahahahaahahahahahaahahaha
shaun: hahahahahahaahahahaha
shaun: hahaha
shaun: ahaha
shaun: ahaha
shaun: ahahaha
shaun: ok
shaun: hahah
shaun: ok
shaun: you gotta read this
shaun: i checked the guys in kamloops to see if i knew any of them
mike: k
shaun: http://meetme.hotornot.com/r/?emid=KMARR8R (note: website address outdated)
shaun: here's his pic
shaun: annnnd
shaun: here's what he wrote
mike: deathbolt
mike: hahaha
shaun: "Greetings, my real name is darian but everyone calls me Deathbolt or haethose i am a Tall, Dark, Submissive, gothic male. i like girls, swordfighting, paintball, drawing etc If thowith lookith for Deathbolt thouith shall findeth"
shaun: lolol
shaun: hahahaha
shaun: so i can laugh at him with a megaphone
shaun: and then beat him
"cow" - feb. 18/04

mike: i just bought a cow in Final Fantasy Crystal Chronicles
shaun: annnd wha do you do with this...cow?
mike: i don't know
shaun: and this....cow.....does it have a name?
shaun: or at the very least a birthmark?
mike: not that i know of
shaun: hmm i see
shaun: then we will name him gnorf
mike: ok
shaun: and carve a happy face into his ass
shaun: so we'll recognize him
mike: he might not like that
"gin and oj" - feb. 19/04

mike: Gin and orange juice is pretty good.
dale: Yeah, just like puking on your own face
"blueberries" - feb. 21/04

john: How about blueberries, man? You can make millions picking blueberries if you know how to fucking pick your blueberries.
"milkshake" - feb. 24/04

jay: Turn on much music right now, NO questions
mike: k
(turn on muchmusic to Kellis "Milkshake")
mike: sigh
jay: hahahahaha
jay: night
"crossword" - feb. 24/04

shaun: i'm doing a crossword right now
shaun: what'a hibernating rodent
mike: gopher
mike: field mouse
mike: ferret
mike: badger
shaun: hmm
shaun: 6 letters
shaun: third is r
mike: BADGER
mike: hm
mike: FERRET
shaun: nope
shaun: got it
shaun: marmot
mike: Jerboa
shaun: uhhhh
shaun: ok there
mike: The jerboa is a small, long-tailed rodent that hops.
mike: http://www.enchantedlearning.com/subjects/mammals/rodent/Jerboa.shtml
shaun: you are full of useless crap
shaun: k we sooo need to talk about the 'jerboa' on the next show
shaun: dude i suck at this crossword puzzle
mike: feed me more
shaun: ok
shaun: cass elliot, once
shaun: four letters
shaun: starts with M
mike: MIKE
shaun: I KNOW
mike: MAMA
mike: whoa
mike: that totally is it too
shaun: yeah it is
shaun: you fuck nut
mike: Denis Leary "I think Mama Cass said it best when she said "allll the leaves are ACK AGGH HACCCK" "
mike: that is the only reason i know that
shaun: hahahahaha
"back door" - feb. 25/04

shaun: k this super stuck up bitch just came and got a room, i'll explain in a minute, and it will be a nice angry rant
mike: ok
shaun: ARRRG
shaun: stupidfuckinstuckupfurcoatwearingcreamofsocietycaddilacdrivingbitch!!!!!!
mike: why
shaun: k she came in here, asked if we had any single rooms avail...so i said yes, so i gave her the only single room we had left,
shaun: then i told her her room number, 226
shaun: and she flipped cause she had to carry 'all' her bags upstairs
shaun: all 2 of them tiny little bags
mike: haha
shaun: next, she complained cause she had to come in through the lobby
shaun: cause the doors are all locked this time at night
shaun: one at the base of the stairs, it's like taking off 14ft of walking
shaun: oh and hold on, she just came to the counter to ask me if she was all checked out now, and i told her "no when you check you have to come down to the front desk, give us your key, and we check you out"
shaun: So she says (with her nose in the air) "and THEN can i use the back door?
shaun: i said sure, if it's after 7
mike: haha
shaun: i'm writing a note about her in "THE BOOK"
mike: what's the book?
shaun: oh just a little note book where we leave notes about customers and the stupid things they do
shaun: like not knowing how to work the muffin drawers
shaun: they like to try and rip the top off the container
shaun: so we make fun of them in "THE BOOK"
"dale the artist" - feb. 28/04

security guard: Hey, there's washrooms inside to do that!"
dale: (peeing) Yeah, but there's no snow in the urinals inside for me to write my name in.


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